From A Seasoned Pilgrim
By Marla Lindstrom Benroth
Several years ago I met a remarkable 83-year-old woman, Rita From. She spoke with an infectious, upbeat, matter-of-fact tone in her voice. I could sense her indomitable, fearless spirit. Rita’s reputation had preceded her – I knew that when she was in her mid 70s, she had climbed the antenna tower next to her house to the roof to get a clear shot with her rifle – at a marauding skunk foraging in her flower garden.
By modern standards, this may seem like a Herculean feat, but she was taking care of the farm herself. And, until a recent heart problem she said she never needed to go to the doctor; the only pills she popped were vitamins.
As I recall how this impish sage unearthed a treasure chest of jewels collected from a long life lived abundantly, I knew I wanted to share these nuggets with you as you embark on a brand new year in 2008.
Rita’s Six Secrets to living a long, abundant life:
1. Stay Active – there’s no such thing as retirement!
Out of bed at 6:30 every morning, Rita has a full schedule keeping her large farm in operation. She apologizes that she is “down to only one” vegetable garden; yet manages several flourishing flower gardens filled with colorful peace roses, day lilies and peonies. She rolls up her sleeves and rot tills at the beginning of the season, perpetually keeping weeds at bay throughout the spring and summer. Rita avoids pesticides – “You know, you can use tobacco juice – it’ll kill anything!” She preserves the fruits of her labor, lugging 5-gallon buckets of cucumbers in the pre-canning process.
“Would you like some pickles?” she asks me.
In addition to farm chores, she cares for Babe, the hulking barrel-like Australian Shepherd who follows her everywhere; and two cats, Casper (who is black, the opposite of a ghost) and multi-colored Jackpot, named by her granddaughter. She feeds eight semi-wild cats, which stake out their barn territory, along with five chickens, from which she gathers 11 eggs a day.
Responding to my look of disbelief at her accomplishments at her age, she quickly comments, “I don’t want to quit doing anything. I don’t believe in retirement.”
2. Take responsibility.
The octogenarian has this down-to-earth philosophy to impart: “Why do we blame our childhood for everything? It’s your choice to be nasty or nice! It’s what you make out of life that is important.”
3. Take risks – live fearlessly.
Rita says when she was a small girl, her brothers saddled up a half-grown bull and placed her on top – she delightedly rode him around the farm. An admitted rebel, she said she walked a mile-and-a-half across the state border to grade school, wearing “overhauls,” which girls didn’t wear in those days. “I really didn’t care what people thought.” As a young person, she was protective of her sister; when others would make her cry and run away, “I’d kick the thunder out of them!” Rita confides with a look of triumph.
She allows pheasant hunters on her land, but only if they park their vehicles and walk in. When she caught a group of hapless hunters burning tire marks in her field, she had a talk with them. Finding they were armed with more excuses than ammunition, she took her rifle, aimed it at an unlucky pheasant wandering nearby and bagged it with one shot. The hunters were duly amazed and backed off in awed reverence.
“That was nothing but a lucky shot,” Rita admits to me, “but it proved to those lazy hunters a vehicle was not necessary.”
4. Take time for friends and loved ones.
I soon realize how wrong my impression of Rita was. I thought she enjoyed being independent, living almost like a hermit. How little I know. Although she is quite content to live alone – she said after her beloved husband’s death several years ago, she has no desire to remarry – she cherishes time with family and friends and the people at her church home for 55 years.
I notice that one wall in her living room tells a true tale – it is full of up-to-date pictures of happy grandchildren and loved ones. She smiles broadly when talking about their visits to the farm, including the annual Easter egg hunt. She showers her grandkids with unconditional love and tries to impart values like honesty and right living. In a matter-of-fact way, she admits a big enticement. “They like Grandma because of the cookies!”
5. Have a hobby you love.
I tour Rita’s ceramics workshop next to the house, which is filled with hundreds of ceramics in various stages of completion, from greenware to finished piece. She and Clarence worked side-by-side on their hobbies when he was alive – his pleasure was to create jewelry from polished stones; necklaces, earrings and equipment still fill half the building. She said it took her a while before she felt she could pursue her hobby in the shop alone, they had shared so many warm times there together. But now, she has happily resumed making Christmas ornaments for kids during the holidays and special creations for others. She relishes time in her ceramics sanctuary now.
6. Draw personal strength from a spiritual relationship.
Most surprising of all is when Rita reveals a tender spot. She has bounced back so resiliently from tragic events in her life – the car accident on a train track several years ago that killed her lifelong companion, Clarence, and caused her to lose some of her hearing and sight in one eye; the recent heart attack; her daughter Joan’s illness and death last year; and the concerns of taking care of a farm by herself during a terrible drought.
I want to know the source of her strength. She tells me that the spiritual focus of her life “makes things easy – so easy.”
“How?” I ask.
Her eyes begin to fill with tears, and it is evident we have reached a deep part of this dear, seemingly indomitable lady’s soul. I know this is a precious moment, a flash in time when this fearless independent woman decides to allow me into a mysterious, private place in her heart.
“Because I feel that I am taken care of,” she says, her voice cracking. “When I misplace stuff, I find it because of Him.”
Rita tells me she believes God is her Partner, her Comforter and that she can cast her fears anxieties upon Him. She said the Bible’s 23rd Psalm is her favorite: “The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul…”
Quickly resuming her cantankerous disposition, the venerable sprite smoothes her dress and with a smile on her face, she abruptly declares, “I’m ready anytime!”
But, in the meantime, there are ceramics to make and skunks to kill.
